“You eat like a truck driver,” a friend commented amiably over dinner the other night.

He’s right, too. Not so much in terms of quantity—although I can pack it away given the opportunity—but speed.

“You just put your head down and when you looked up, the plate was clean,” another friend once said.

It’s true and I’m not proud of it. I particularly hate when waiters take my plate away as soon as I’m done, making my shame more obvious.

So I’ve been trying this whole mindful eating thing. I caught the TLC show I Can Make You Thin the other day. It's mostly a lot of repackaged razzmatazz about something that’s been around a while. My friend Jean Fain, who does psychotherapy and hypnosis, has been teaching it to her clients for a long time. She make videos and CDs, too. See, here’s someone eating a Twinkie mindfully.



Hm. If it had been me, that Twinkie would never have known what hit it.

I’m trying, really. When I remember, I put my fork down between bites. I’ve tried to chew my food 20 times like the I Can Make You Thin guy recommends but that’s really kind of disgusting. I become aware of the chewed food in my mouth. (Hm, might that be the point? Some sort of aversion therapy?) And a peanut butter and banana sandwich cannot withstand 20 chews.

But my biggest struggle with the whole deal is that you’re not supposed to do anything else while you’re eating. Conversation, maybe, but no TV or reading or working. I tried this and realized that while I like food, eating is boring. I usually eat lunch (such as it is) at my desk. The other day, I sat at the kitchen table and tried to eat mindfully. Just me, alone, in the quiet, chewing. Whee.

I need to find a compromise between cramming lunch down my gullet as quickly as possible and sitting silently chewing for 30 minutes. Don’t know what that is yet.

Next I’ll try Jean’s hypnosis video. Can’t hurt, might help. Wish I had a Twinkie.

Labels: dieting, eating, hypnosis, personal growth, Twinkies