Read this. John Hodgman on being famous. Longish but hilarious.

Labels: celebrities, humor, pop culture

Life, it is hard. Sleep often.



Thanks Ms. Krit.

Labels: humor, video

Pardon my lousy mood. I’ll try to keep it to myself and just toss a little cheery flotsam your way.

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Cute Overload has a particularly great post today--check out the Prairie Dog smash-ups, here. Sound necessary. Some people have magical talents.

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If I dug a hole in my backyard straight through the other side of the Earth, I would emerge in the middle of the Indian Ocean. Which doesn’t sound like a lot of fun. How do I know this? Worldhum turned me on to the cool and essentially useless Google Tunneling Tool. Just because. Beats working.

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New model, same depressing style…



Evidently, there’s a small anti-Dillard’s movement brewing. Stockholders aren’t happy. Here’s a blogful of complaints. Evidently women don’t want to dress like Opal Pickles.

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Speaking of fashion, if you’re a fan of The Sartorialist then check out the senior version, Advanced Style. The text can be patronizing at times but the intentions are good and the styles range from inspiring to merely impressively audacious.

The video below comes to us via Advanced Style and this lady rocks.



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Another well-informed voter unleashes her ire on Charles Gibson’s glasses.



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You can tell I reported this story about visiting the fabulous Best Friends Animal Sanctuary a long time ago, because l'il ZsaZsa (RIP) makes an appearance in the lede. But I'm glad the story has finally made it into print.

And here's a story about my most recent glamorous trip, to the Choctaw Casino in Durant, OK. Actually, we had a pretty good time. Oklahoma good.

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OK, let’s all cheer up, because the renewed mind is the key. This is a must-watch, coming to me via my kooky friends at the United Methodist Reporter (via Best TV Week Ever). Warning: Earworm ahead.

Labels: advertising, dillard's, fashion, humor, politics, travel

Thanks to my friends at the United Methodist Reporter for leading me to this.

You must look. Yes, you must.

Labels: humor, video

Whew. If a butterfly dies in the forest, will it give me computer problems?

Yes, I think so. I’ve had a week of hell, misery and frustration trying to change Web hosts. I never did figure out some of the problems, but just as I was prepared to solve it all by smashing the monitor and cutting my wrists with the shards, I dropped a desperate email to my Web designer (with whom I’d spent an hour on the phone earlier in the week) who told me to delete one file and … the angels sang. They’re still singing. As for the unsolved problems? Fuck 'em. Life is short. I have a headache.

I have lots to talk about but lack the energy to do so at the moment. So instead, I’ll leave you with a laff and plan to get back on the program tomorrow. Or something.


more funny fail pictures at FAIL Blog

Labels: computers, humor, tech support

So many wonderful horrible album covers. How to choose?

See them here.

Thank you Ms Krit. Thank you so very much.

Labels: art, elections, humor, the horror, the meaning of life

Just a soupcon of flotsam today…

This is NOT FUNNY.

Everybody cast your votes! (Thanks, Mary. And no, it has nothing to do with Hillary/Obama. We're all exhausted ...)

Have you finished your Passover gift shopping yet? If not, MsKrit alerts us to these very special items.

Today’s newspaper was chock full of dreary, terrifying news about the economy and believe me, we’re feeling it. How are we going to pay for the electric fence we are having installed at this very moment? We have no idea. Things are a little tense around the house this morning and Jack doesn’t even know yet how his world is about to rocked. All he knows is that there are strange men in the backyard and he’s stuck in the house.

But I digress. I mention the newspaper mostly to show you this photo, the most entertaining thing in today’s paper. What’s the deal with the hoochie mama topiaries? Dallas is SO conflicted about sex….

And finally, huzzah! Not only is Dr. Phil finally, really tumbling from grace, but this MSN reaming actually mentions our book! Now, everybody run out and buy a copy!

OK, let’s get out there an EARN SOME MONEY! Jack-y needs a new pair of shoes. (Or something. He always needs something. A bath, for example.)

Labels: blogging, books, dogs, dr. phil, humor, passover, writing

I’m having an intermittent problem with my e-mails not hitting their destinations. And you know what intermittent means—tech support will not believe me because the tests I sent to “Jason” arrived, of course. He said things like, “Sometimes when you type the wrong e-mail address…” C’mon, Jason. Don’t you think I checked that? If I coulda reached through the phone line and throttled him…

So what do I do now other than slump at my desk?

Anyway, if you’re wondering why I didn’t respond to your e-mail, I probably did.

This is an exciting weekend in Duncanville, where the second-annual Texas Open Bonspiel will take place. And you know what that means, don’t you? Yes indeed, the Duncanville will be all abuzz with curlers from across the country! (Read all about it here.) Perhaps I can persuade a couple to come sweep my kitchen floor. Talk about flotsam--Jack tracks in all kinds of mess on his giant feet that we're not allowed to touch.

Got an email with this subject line the other day: Save 15% on Col-Pure at The Collagen Store Grand Opening!

The Collagen Store?

Cartoon du jour.

So, evidently and not surprisingly, the same newspaper decline that’s occurring here is also happening in France. But those French journalists are not gonna take it sitting down. They’re striking! Yeah, like that’s gonna help…

Here’s a new book concept that I find totally bizarre and yet bizarrely compelling:

THANK GOD I
Most controversial book ever launches later next week

New York City, NY “Rape, Cancer, Death, and Divorce. Can you imagine being grateful for any of these things? Finally a book that transforms the human experience according to creator of the Thank God I series”, John Castagnini.

“Thank God I, soon to be the largest inspirational book series since Chicken Soup for the Soul, unites a world-wide community of individuals to share personal stories of gratitude for their past adversities. Thousands of writers will reveal gut-wrenching accounts of how they transformed perceived crisis into blessings” added Castagnini.

Labels: books, cartoons, computers, flotsam, humor, newspapers, tech support

According to a highway sign I saw today, this is Work Zone Safety Week!

Did you buy me a present?

Labels: highways, holidays, humor, meaningless stuff

Here comes high-maintenance season, and I don’t just mean yard work. (Though we did finally clear the leaves from the yard and the Garden Bed of Death is showing encouraging signs of life.

But more than that, the months of shaggy legs and toes au naturel are waning. Body parts must be toned and exfoliated, pits must be pristine. It was warm enough for shorts or a summer skirt this weekend but my legs were in no shape to expose and so I sweated it out in jeans.

A young woman in one of my yoga classes is toned and fit and hairy-legged as a little boy. I envy her insouciance. I can’t do that and never could—the stereotype of the hairy feminist is just bigotry. Most feminists I know are as vigilant about body hair as any beauty queen.

So, it’s time to get out the wax and start ripping hair out by its roots. It’s a dreary, not to mention painful, and unending chore. Shaving is no better because it must be done more often.

And time to start booking pedicures, which are pleasant but ultimately pricey, by the end of our long spring and summer.

But a gal’s gotta do what a gal’s gotta do.

I read in the paper this morning that the London Tech Music School named Smoke on the Water the greatest guitar riff of all time. So naturally, that’s been on a maddening tape loop in my head all morning. Maybe I can exorcise it by passing it on to you.

This recipe for garlicky garbanzo burgers sounds yummy to me. The DMN Taste section consistently has great recipes, I plan to try this one soon.

I like today’s Dilbert. (April 9, if you’re coming to this blog another day.) Hostility is fun!


I got blogrolled by Poopouri and it’s getting a lot of clicks. I’m sure people are disappointed when they get there to find me just mocking rather than reviewing. But evidently, a lot of people are worried about bathroom odors. Maybe I could ask for a review sample …

I always mean to link to my articles when they run but don’t always remember. So, here’s one about ADD that ran in December.

And another about Earthwatch that ran in October, I think.

Black and Blue has two more gigs booked at the AllGood—May 3 and May 23. Mark your calendars and come have fun!

Labels: beauty, cartoon, food, humor, music, recipes

This arrived at 11:15 p.m. and for some reason made me laugh very out loud.

Labels: cartoon, cats, humor, wordplay

somebody who understands me

Labels: humor, phobias, telecommunications

Best news story I've seen today.

Thanks MsKrit

Labels: humor, news

Thank you, Suck It Trebek (see my blogroll for a link), for this: Least Inspiring Flags.

Labels: design, flags, humor, travel

For some reason, this touches a chord deep within me.

Labels: humor, the meaning of life